North Korea, Best Korea!
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize