we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
