How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Reggie can tackle my bush.
she pinky promised me she was 18
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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