He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
