I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
