every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
