Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
