I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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