I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Please, let me fuck your mom
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
