their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
the condom got lost in my hair
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
