i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
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