The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
