there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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