Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
