do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
