is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
