I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
The ass gains better be worth it
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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