I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
