Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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