so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
