Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Randomize
