Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I just found a bag of teeth...
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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