just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
