Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
