hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
