What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
