: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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