I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
