So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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