never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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