No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
