Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just googled if crying burns calories
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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