Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize
