why didn't you poke me back
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
