Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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