Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
