I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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