But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Randomize
