Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize