ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
