I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
