He kissed a someone with a penis
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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