me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
