Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
