butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
