last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize