We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize