Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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