Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
