ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
