How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
